It's weird the way we can be doing something for a lotta years and then discover what we have been doing. These postings are an example of just that. We adopt our hobbies as we go along in life based on our needs which have resulted usually, from actual experience. We do the same with the habits we possess. My hobby and habit over my life has been writing; or so I thought.
I have discovered that I am not actually writing. Firstly I'm typing. Writing no longer exists because it takes too much effort to find a pen and paper and when we do write it is block letters now because we are trying to be as neat and legible as our computers. We don't have a taste for flowery appearance any longer- bland sterile and uncluttered is the modern of today. And although literature is flowery at times most of what we write is done with a bland yet clear communication in matter-of-fact style. We haven't the time to piss fart around trying to understand what the hell is goin' on. We are in a hurry---- now get on with the story! And this is exactly what I don't do. I don't get on with it. Both in writing and in life. I like to sit on my backside and slowly sniff the flowers in life. Looking up at the Sun is about the most active I like to be in a day.
So what do I do? I stream consciousness. Doesn't that sound simply amazing. I thought I was just lazy and that there was no point in most anything we humans do in our lives. I looked around at the flurry of activity people involve themselves in and I thought it is all so pointless really. I thought we were simply killing time making out that what we do is of some importance somewhere along the line- but it really isn't. It feels important. Our lives do feel very important- to us- but really when you reduce it like stock, it boils down to nothing in the end. It tastes good at a certain point but as you continue to boil it, well, nothing remains. This may be how life goes. So what I do is add more and more flavouring to the stock as I go. And I do that by activities such as this.
These are my stream of consciousness and this is just another way of describing overthinking. No wonder most people prefer not to think too much but rather just do. They would hate to discover that if they look at their actions from a distance they look like busy little ants do to us and that is very busy yet their busyness means nothing to us. We know it means a lot to their survival of course and that is important. But that is all we really do. Work for our survival. There are those among us who look for deeper meaning though. I know we are silly. But we do it. And if you get busy being busy then you really can't have the time to really analyze the overall picture of our existence. God, I sound, look and feel lazy.Am I lazy? Yes to a busy person I would look lazy but I look at those people as ants.
Within that analogy: when the ant looks back at me looking at it well, it just doesn't understand does it because it's caught in its little world being busy.
I don't write this to sound superior but it will sound that way. Philosophical thought often does. Keep in mind while you are busy it's just a thought; it's just my "stream of consciousness". And in the end --relax. We are important and what we do is important because we make it so through our "stream of consciousness". We swim in it every day in our own way filled with a feeling of importance.