I have known many troubled women in my life. My mother was a very troubled person. She was very bitter and self destructive and only lived to 59 due to her excessive smoking and drinking. As result I seem to have continued to collect a variety of "friends" who are of the female persuasion and who are emotionally bereft. I have done this probably to, in some way, replace my mother even though these women are rather much younger than me.
Anyway enough of the psycho-analytical stuff and on with the fun.
The other day I read a friend's facebook status- can't imagine why I bother but I do- She sounded in a very bad way so I sms'd her to see what her problem was. Yes I am an idiot! Gentlemen! Rule number one. Never ask a woman what the problem is if it doesn't involve you personally. You are really going to be told and you run the risk of becoming embroiled. Well of course that's what happened to me. I became the object of her derision rather than the person she was actually having problems with. I was called everything from a grumpy old man ( true) through to a split personality disordered person. And why you may ask. Well here it is:
Wait for it-------- I told her I thought her taste in men was in her boots--- how's that for a true idiot? Here she was complaining about her drug addicted partner and I went ahead and told her that her taste in men needed to improve. Well you can see the problem here can't you? I am a real problem. I tell the truth. We are not supposed to do that. You are not supposed to advise a friend that his or her taste may be a little off. Because, you see, we all have impeccable taste. And the fact that we have repeated problems with the partners we hook up with and the fact that so many go through the chute ending badly and the fact that there is an underlying type of person that we keep hooking up with who makes our life misery at a certain point---- well it's nothing to do with our taste is it? I shouldn't have even gone there. But like an idiot I did and I paid the price.
Scathing she was in her attack which she considered defence of course.
I'm 57. I'm a big mouth. I'm trouble to women who actually don't really wish to solve their problems but more, maintain them, so their lives are more exciting. Because as I see it- many unfortunate women have only one interest-- emotion--and they get it whichever way they can and it can be either positive or negative - it matters not to them. It's a habit. And it's virtually impossible to break it and I am learning that through some of the females ( not all mind you) I know in my life.
And they are trouble to me- and I am trouble to them. Because a big mouth is the worst thing for these women and these women are the worst thing for a big mouth. This is what is referred to as co-dependency.